Maybe We Were Never Meant to Be Small

How many of us make ourselves smaller just to fit in?

How many of us make ourselves quieter so we do not disturb the room?

How many of us would rather become the wallflower than the speaker because hiding feels safer than being seen?

As for me, I am absolutely certain I have done this.

I learned from a very early age to be seen as little as possible and absolutely not heard. And when you grow up in a noisy household, being seen can feel complicated. Sometimes being noticed is the very last thing you want. Other times, it is the only thing you want.

I grew up trying to be heard, and then once I was heard, I was often dismissed.

That is not something I say with blame. It is simply how it was. Not good. Not bad. Just part of the story. And as I have come to believe, every single thing we experience, whether painful or beautiful, carries a lesson.

But as a full-grown adult, I can still feel the old imprint.

The fear of being too much.

Too loud.

Too visible.

Too heard.

Too emotional.

Too passionate.

Too different.

And yet, as a full-grown adult who has lived through betrayal, pain, rejection, disappointment, healing, awakening, and more lessons than I can count, I also know this:

I am not here to be small.

I am not here to be silent.

I am not here to disappear into the background just because visibility feels uncomfortable.

I am here to recognize my growth and embrace it.

Every trauma, every insight, every loss, every heartbreak, every moment of clarity has brought me to this exact day and this exact moment. And while I still have to work every day at being visible, I am learning that invisible is not the same as safe.

It is familiar.

It is comfortable.

But it is not freedom.

I believe every single one of us is here at this time in history to shed who we were told to be and begin embracing who we actually are.

Our big selves.

Our truthful selves.

Our no-longer-silent selves.

Our unapologetic, authentic, soul-aligned selves.

And I get it. Being seen is hard. It can feel uncomfortable, exposing, and even unsafe when your past taught you that visibility came with consequences.

But hiding in the shadows is not the answer either.

So maybe we walk this journey together.

Maybe we have compassion for ourselves and understanding for those who walk beside us.

Maybe we offer a whole lot of love to the parts of us that learned to hide.

Maybe we ask ourselves the hard questions.

Where am I still making myself smaller?

Where am I still silencing my truth?

Where am I choosing comfort over growth?

Where am I allowing an old story to define a new version of me?

Maybe we need to accept that there is still healing to do.

Maybe we need to let go of the old story.

Maybe we need to write a new one.

And maybe the new story begins with this:

I am allowed to be seen.

I am allowed to be heard.

I am allowed to take up space.

I am allowed to grow.

I am allowed to become the fullest, brightest, truest version of myself.

Not someday.

Now.

Until next time, keep walking boldly into your light, even when it feels uncomfortable. The world does not need a smaller version of you. It needs the authentic, beautiful soul you came here to be.

With love and light,

Theri Edwards
Visionary Light Journey